De-patterning

This is a complex topic, because it addresses a fundamental attribute of being human, something we are good at. In short, it is a strength, that when carried too far, is a profound difficulty, which must be overcome. You’ll see what I mean as I proceed. 

Over the years, as I have been doing a variety of things related to aging, I’ve noticed that all old people are not the same. The vast majority of older people are caught up in what I call ruts, that is, routines that have always been successful at bringing them comfort and safety. They are the ones I call ‘merely older.’ They, to my eyes, are rut-bound — captive of patterns of their own making. 

I have also noted, and given special attention too, the minority of old folks who are elders, or on the way toward elderhood. They have ruts too, but are actively trying to identify, and get out of them. For them, the patterns of a lifetime hinder their freedom and creativity. As you might guess, these few, are more in the moment, and more original. It is to them, I look, for examples of what’s uniquely possible in we humans.

Here, I’m not so concerned about the plight of old people, as I am about the human tendency to adopt patterns that become ruts — which trap and diminish us. You see, our very development seems to depend upon our ability to adopt good routines, but our aspiration to be free, depends upon our ability to break out of them. Fail to adopt optimal patterns, and one never becomes coherent and recognizable, but stay too long with any pattern and risk becoming rigid and inflexible. 

This is vexing challenge — one that befits an organism as complex as we humans. But, in my estimation, it accounts for the limited number of true elders in our midst. People don’t realize how dangerous their own capabilities are. The successful routine that guaranteed love, attention, safety, or self-worth, ultimately becomes the habitual and binding rut that enslaves imagination and hardens attitudes into prejudices. Supremacy of all sorts lives in the cherished ruts of yesteryear.

Breaking these old patterns, and climbing out of old ruts, is an essential component of being human. This is an endeavor that is always difficult, and essential. It is comparable to molting. A significant part of the difficulty involved, is that going beyond these old patterns, always includes periods of vulnerability. Exposure to the unknown is part of the deal. Enculturated humans in particular are allergic to this kind of exposure — making the ruts (routines) all that more alluring.

Rutting, of all sorts is very human — as is escaping the ruts. That is why children like to get dizzy, and why many people like altered states. Each provides a way to experience the world anew, from a brief, rut-free zone. None of these avenues, as powerful (like mind-altering substances) as they are, provides the innate confidence that comes with discovery. This is an on-board natural skill. It is part of our human resilience — a part, which needs to be exercised, to be believed.

De-patterning, escaping our self-made ruts, is as natural and essential as all forms of birth. We have no choice but to practice de-patterning, but whether we get good enough at it, depends upon willingness (courage) and insight (understanding the necessity of exposure) to practice it throughout a lifetime. Because this is so, it is easy to see that elders grow, like the rest of us, through the breaking of old, formerly binding patterns. De-patterning is another form of emancipation. De-patterning is wisdom — unleashed.